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Book: Plastic Viking Helmets
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Virtual Adam
Introduction
Do you have green fingers? typing skills considered
Preparing the ground background research
Planting the seeds getting ready to plan
The green shoots a plan
Feeding and watering developing the plan
Weeding working on the first go
Useful tools helpful features in the word processor
Style individualism in writing
Pests and diseases dangers and problems with word processor writing
The harvested crop: an example essay
The harvested crop
By clicking on the links in the text of the essay, you will be taken to the relevant part of the plan. From there, to get back to the same part of the essay, click the link that is in the plan.Does Father Christmas Really Exist?
In this essay I will argue that father Christmas does exist. To support this I will show that there is some evidence in favour of his existence, but the main part of the essay is concerned with showing that existing alternative theories are in fact more ridiculous than the idea of Father Christmas. I will start by considering the meaning of the question and providing some definitions.
The question is asking whether there really is a person who delivers presents on December 24th each year. The question is inspired by growing speculation in some parts of the population that there is no such person, and that presents arrive by some other means. The chief opposing theory, which is the only one considered in this essay, is that your parents do it.
Various definitions of Father Christmas have been proposed:
"The main man. Don't mess with Santa, he's the boss round here." (Elfman, 1988, p1)
"A fictitious character, traditionally said to deliver presents at Christmas." (Spoilsport, 1953, p31294)
"Totally brill, can't wait!" (Toddler, 1993, p6)
So it is apparent that there is an ongoing debate over the existence of Father Christmas. The easiest way to resolve this once and for all would be for somebody to wait up and take a photograph of the person delivering presents. However, since seeing Santa on the night would result in the photographer getting a sack of cinders instead of presents, no researcher has yet volunteered for the task.
So we have no prospect of getting hard evidence, but such circumstantial evidence as there is points strongly in favour of Father Christmas. I will now consider this evidence. Firstly I will evaluate the evidence in favour, and then I will show why the evidence against is inadequate.
First hand accounts from those who are in contact with Father Christmas are available. Of course these could have been made up by those involved, but we should consider the solid reputation of these speakers.
Rudolph has been quoted as saying:
"Of course he exists. Do you think me and the others would whiz round like idiots all night towing a sleigh with nobody in it?" (Rednose, 1975, p48).
Of equally good character is Henry the Elf, who said:
"Yeah, I've heard that people say he [Father Christmas] doesn't exist, but in a system of industrialised capitalism there has to be an identifiable owner in charge, otherwise we'd be operating some kind of commie co operative operation, which we're not. Frankly I don't know where our profits go, but we don't see any of them on the shop floor. Somebody's creaming off the takings, and if it ain't Father Christmas I don't know who else it could be." (Elf, 1984, p134)
On a personal level, my mum taught me not to lie, and so she obviously does not lie herself. I remember her telling me about Father Christmas many times, so I am personally convinced.
Further support is given when we consider that in modern homes there is no chimney, or existing chimneys have been blocked by gas or electric fires. It follows that whoever delivers presents must be magic, or else how could the presents get into a locked house?
Now we must consider the main alternative theory, which is that it is your parents who leave out your presents on Christmas Eve.
It is clear that it cannot be your parents. My Mum lives eighty miles away, and has arthritis, so the idea that she travels to my house in the middle of the night and climbs up on the roof (for which she would have to bring a ladder, since mine is locked up) and then drops down the chimney to bring my presents seems much more unlikely than the idea that Father Christmas does it with magic at his disposal.
An argument used against the existence of Father Christmas is that he looks different whenever you see him in different shops or on different TV programmes. It is proposed then that these are people dressed up as Father Christmas, and therefore that the real Father Christmas does not exist.
There is a fundamental flaw in this logic. Just because people dress up as him does not mean he does not exist. You do not have to go to many fancy dress parties to see lots of different looking Hitlers, yet we do not deduce from this that Hitler did not exist.
On weighing up the evidence available, while we cannot conclusively prove that Father Christmas does exist, we can demonstrate that some kind of magic is needed, and that the main alternative theory does not stand up to considered reflection. Upright characters have spoken in favour of his existence, and the fact that some people dress up as him is irrelevant.
The evidence clearly leads us to conclude that Father Christmas does really exist.
References and bibliography
Henry the Elf, "Memoirs of a happy toyshop worker", Grotto Press, 1984
Rodney Elfman, "How to survive in the toy industry", Polar Technology Publishing, 1988
Rudolph Rednose, "Santa and Me: The Truth", North Pole Press, 1975
Real Spoilsport, "A miserable guide to Christmas", Cynical Press Ltd, 1953
Small Toddler, "How to get giddy with excitement at Christmas", Whoopee Press, 1993